21 July 2009

Trusting and Entrusting


As I sat contemplating on my gall bladder and liver problem after my lunch, our church's head Pastor's message came to my recollection. I have already heard him mention this twice on different services. Where do we put our trust? We entered the building, which houses the church and we trust the architect that the cement ceiling wouldn't fall down upon our heads. One of the band members sat under one of the speakers and he trusted that it wouldn't crash down upon him. As I sat on one of the pews, was I not worried it would give under my weight? Of course, it is not his intention to let us become paranoid! Pastor just wished to call to our attention the fact that these things are made by man, and we feel secure using them, what more that which is made by God?

How is this connected with my maladies, you ask? Well, I admit I haven't been praying much recently. And I know it is indecent of me to be starting on it again now that I am in trouble. The doctors I went to said that I should undergo surgery and have my gall bladder removed. I really do not want to be cut open again. And would my liver be cured by removing my gall bladder? Maybe not. I wouldn't want to be at the mercy of doctors with scalpels. That's the reason I tried the Apple Juice therapy, so the stones would leave the natural way. and the reason I am now taking Chinese herbal medicine. But the ones who introduced and made, respectively, are also humans, prone to making mistakes. And I know I needed God. I know that only He has the power to heal me, to make me well. It is Him that I needed to trust. I was made by Him, and He knows my anatomy more than I do.

Now that I have resolved to trust Him once more. I need to entrust myself to Him, too, along with all my problems and cares. Entrusting means fully handing over to God something that I cannot do anything about. It is beyond my capabilities. Worrying about it is unequal to entrusting. Sometimes I think too much about a challenge and it is admittedly quite unhealthy.

Typing it here makes me more decided to follow through: I am trusting God to heal me, and I entrust to Him my illness and all other worries.

Note: I am not saying I will escape surgery altogether. If the alternative ways fail to work, and if it is absolutely necessary, I am willing to undergo the ordeal.
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